You Can Have Too Much of a Good Thing?

The truth is that everyone is a hypocrite . . . except me. 

A few nights ago I was in a car that had some women in it and somehow the conversation turned to kissing.  We started talking about how many people we had kissed in an allotted period of time and in our whole lives.

I don't keep track of that number.  It's not that the number is insanely high or hard to count, I just don't.  Am I the only one? 

So while everyone else rattles off a number and moves on, I sit there trying to recall the last decade of my life and debating whether the few that happened at parties or during games or on New Years Eve actually count or not.

This time instead of putting a definite numerical value on every spit swapping occurrence of my life, we only discussed the people I've locked lips with since moving to Arizona two years ago.

Compared to a lot of my friends in The Grand Canyon State, I'm probably considered a lonely man in the middle of a drought.

But I get the impression that some of my college friends think I get passed around more than catch phrase at a mormon game night. 

So what is the standard?  Who determines the line between floozy (floozie, floosy, floosie) and prude?  There is no pamphlet or scripture stating "Thou shalt not kiss more than 3 women in any 6 month period of time."

So who decides how much is too much and how much is not enough? . . .  Well, I guess I do. 

The beautiful thing is that it takes two to tango.  So listen up "all the single ladies," here are the new rules, and remember, the guys can't receive more kisses than you bestow upon them:

1- Don't give away your kisses like candy (unless it's to me, because I really value candy, even if we mutually decide after a while that your candy is making me diabetic, or obese, or causing my teeth to rot, I still appreciate the candy that was given and rarely talk bad about that candy afterward)

2- I just went back and read number 1 and feel I should apologize for getting so carried away, but I'm not going to. I just got going on that ridiculous, egotistical metaphor and I couldn't stop, I'm not apologizing, just explaining.

3- Don't kiss more people than I do.  After extensive research I have come to the conclusion that I have achieved a perfect balance in when to succumb and when to walk away.  So when Jonny smoothtalker is making you laugh and making your heart beat faster with every touch, don't think to yourself "What would Quinn do?"  But rather think "What has Quinn done lately?" 

It would be wrong of me of me to guarantee success and happiness for following this guideline, BUT ... ah what the heck, I guarantee that you will almost always be happy and successful if you follow this guideline!

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111
heart,
k-WIN

I Need A New Layout

The truth is that the last time I changed the look of this blog, I googled something like "cool blog templates."  If you happen to be reading this and you happen to think to yourself why reading "I'm really good at Web Design, I could make Quinn's blog amazing!"  then let me know.  I can't promise that I'll pay you, but I can promise that I'll love you.

What Comes Next?

The Truth is that I'm not sure what "settling into a career" is supposed to be like.  When I was in high school my government teacher told me that the average adult switches careers seven times.  I thought that was absurd.  My parents have had the same careers pretty much their whole lives and from what I can see they're happy and they've raised a good and happy family.  (Seriously, I'm probably the least productive of all the children so far and I'm doing ok)

So here I am, Post College Career Number One.  (Teaching snowboarding lessons and selling credit report repair don't count as careers) It's been good, I help change people's lives by providing them with an education they haven't been able to pursue the same way traditional college students do right out of high school.  I have decent pay and pretty good benefits . . . and I work from a cubicle, and I can't do that forever.  Not for another decade and certainly not until I retire.  There is something about talking on a phone and staring at a computer screen that just wears on me, regardless of how good some of the conversations are.

I've seen some good personal benefits come from my current job the last couple of years.  I've paid off my car, I've built my 401K and I'm in the process of buying my first home.  I haven't advanced my education as far as I hoped because trying to go home and type a paper after sitting in front of a computer for 8 hours per day drove me nuts, but I'm going back to work on that. 

I'm putting my MBA on hold (again) because its not free, but I am going to take advantage of what I can get a tuition waiver for.  I'm going to do my A+ certification followed by my Network+ certification and then my Visual Communication Certificate.  Why the sudden techie obsession?  Because I want to make money from computers.  I want to develop websites and do affiliate marketing and web optimization.  I want to be able to do these things from home and I want to teach.  I want to leave my imprint on the minds of future leaders and help inspire them to greater things.  I want to lecture at a community college and I want to teach classes online so I can travel to Europe and Africa and Asia and Australia and South America. 

I also want to run my own businesses.  Pest and weed control, pool cleaning, landscaping, property management, to go along with my web businesses . . . I'm not sure.  I know this isn't interesting to most people, but I had to get it out there so people would hold me accountable to my own goals and dreams. 

Oh, and also I decided for my blog posts I'm no longer going to use pictures that I don't have the right to use any more.  So I've got to start taking some better pics.

Luv ya,
ttyl,
KwyNh

Multiply and Replenish the Earth

The truth is that I am not timely on my posts.  We are nearing mid-February and I should probably be talking about great presidents that have led our proud nation, or black history, or Valentines Day or something relevant to the season. I have to backtrack all the way to Christmas day to share this experience, but this memory is too good to go undocumented. 

I was over at my sister's house watching my niece and nephew unwrap their plethora of gifts from Santa.  Watching three-year-old and five-year-old faces light up after every present is a riot in and of itself.  But the moment that made me realize that I need to start having offspring of my own was when my nephew opened up some binoculars and was asked by my mom in one of those really nice, overly-animated voices that adults only use around small children:

"What do you have there, Rhett?"

His response was non-chalant, "binoculars . . ." he paused slightly, but then came the clincher ". . . now I can watch my dad wrestle bears in the forest."

And then he was on to open the next one . . . but that comment forever changed me. 

I mean, my brother-in-law is pretty cool guy and all, BUT I doubt he's ever taken down a bobcat in hand to hand combat, much less a bear.  Yet somehow his innocent young son apparently doesn't understand that.  He just knows his dad leaves for work in the morning and comes home at night.  Since he doesn't really understand what happens while he's away, he just assumes that he's throwing down Fight Club style with some of the local wildlife. 

I've had people make assumptions about what goes on in the portion of my life that they don't see, but never anything as insanely awesome as wrestling bears.  That is why I need to have children, so someone will believe that I am as rad as only I currently believe myself to be.

What's the Dealio? . . . the dealio of life . . .

Some of the three of you who read my blog may have noticed that I changed the title.  I miss the old title and I'm experiencing some separation anxiety, but I did it because I've decided I need this blog to have a theme.

So the idea is for me to state a new truth on a daily basis . . . er weekly . . . monthly maybe?

Hmmm . . . ok so at least once per year I promise to improve the world by updating my blog and teaching everyone the truth.

The first indisputable fact I'm throwing out there today is . . . i love cheesecake.

I often drive by an apartment complex here in Tempe called Chesapeake.  More than once I've driven by and at first glance thought the sign for these apartments says Cheesecake.  My heart will start to race for a little while until I realize that the sign actually says Chesapeake.  I don't know why I get so excited, even if it was cheesecake, I don't think I'd stop there to get some anyway.  Now if it said cheese steak, I'd probably be all over that.   

Truth #2: I love cheese steak. yum.

Hot or Not

Not Hot:

Kendra

I don't watch a lot of TV, but I somehow stumbled across her show, I think on E! or something like that. If you don't know what I'm talking about, look her up on Wikipedia.

Ok ok, saying she's not hot may be the wrong way to classify her, she's hot, very hot. Most guys would love to hook up with Kendra, but she's not . . . attractive. I know girls similar to her. It boosts your self-esteem when women like that flirt with you, but most of the guys I know (I don't know Hugh Hefner or Hank Baskett) aren't looking for anything long-term with girls like Kendra.

I know some guys that are into girls like Kendra. I also know some guys who genuinely like the music of Nickelback. The word "trashy" comes to mind.

Sorry Kendra, I'm sure you have plenty of fans and you don't care about my opinion. You're the kind of girl that guys love to look at, but don't like to hear talk. You are in your own world, detached from reality, but you're not by yourself. Have fun with all the Paris Hilton types.

HOT!!!
The chick from the Rhapsody commercials:



What's so spectacular about her? Nothing, really. She has glasses and maybe a gap or something with her teeth. She bobs and sways a little too much in a weird way around the 20 second mark of this video. But there's something about her that is attractive . . . something REAL.

Not many girls are confident enough to say the word "awesomer" and still sound intelligent. That's hot. That's what I want.

No, I don't want Rhapsody girl. I want a girl that I can have an enjoyable conversation with. I want a girl who lives in reality and not in a Disney movie. I want a girl that looks good in sweats or pajamas and that doesn't add unnecessary drama to a relationship. Is Rhapsody girl that type of girl? Maybe not, but I've watched a few of her commercials now, and she seems like it.

The truth is I know plenty of real girls that fit the bill that have paid more attention to me than Rhapsody girl ever will. So why am I not with one now? I'm probably a little too slow to commit when I find one who likes me . . . and I also get distracted sometimes by the Kendras of this world.

I Just Really Need To Do This

I usually update my blog because I am a selfish and conceited person. I haven't added anything for a while because I haven't thought of anything brilliant, entertaining, or witty to post. I know a lot of my posts don't even come close to being entertaining, witty, and certainly not brilliant, but in all reality, the main reason I have a blog is because I want people to think I'm clever.

I know that last paragraph makes me sound like a ginormous tool, but being able to identify my faults and admit to them is a good thing, right? So I've decided to do something incredibly cliche, but sincere, and post a Thanksgiving gratitude list.

I'm grateful (for):

1- My Family: Mom, Dad, sisters and brother, and my other brothers that married into the family, and my nieces and nephew. I lucked out, seriously I don't know how they're so awesome. Sometimes I think I might be nervous about getting married because I'm afraid to bring someone into the family who isn't cool enough. Haha ok so it's probably a little extreme for me to say that! (but it's kinda sorta a little bit true)

2- My job. I don't love it, but I like it ok. It pays my bills and I've made some friends and I get benefits and I almost have my car paid off!!!!!!!!!

3- I almost have my car paid off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111

4- People cook food for me sometimes, even though I don't do nice things for them very often.

5- My church callings in the last year and a half have required me to sit in meetings that I otherwise wouldn't attend. I hate meetings, but in some of those meetings I've felt closer to God. I've been able to see prayers answered and inspiration help people to do better than they would on their own.

6- Sometimes I get stressed out and I snap at people when it's is not even remotely their fault, they just caught me at the wrong time. For some reason that I don't quite understand, these people are still my friends, even though I don't bring much to the table.

7- I've received some priesthood blessings in my life that have given me very distinct promises about things that I had never thought of for myself. I've witnessed the fulfillment of some of these blessings in a very real way that I never imagined possible. I'm grateful for that.

8- I don't read that often, but I've read some really great books in my lifetime. I glad that people write them.

9- Music

10- The Outdoors. Mountains, beaches, forests, sunsets and all that good stuff.

I could go on, but I just got an invite to go eat food. It's almost midnight and I've been eating non-stop since 3 days ago . . . I'm going.