I've Never Been a Teenage Girl...

Therefore I am not very good at taking self portraits.

"Wait a second Quinn, are you stereotyping? Are you being so pompous as to imply that only teenage girls have mastered the fine art of capturing their own beauty and displaying it for all their Facebook friends (and creepy stalkers who aren't their friends) to see?"

No, I am not implying that, imaginary scrutinizer of my words. I am stating it directly. If you are good at taking pictures of yourself, you are a teenage girl.

I'm not saying that's a bad thing. I'm sure teenage boys have something that they are inherently good at as well. For me and my brother, it was taking naps. My napping skills have suffered greatly since entering my 20's.

But let's get back to self portraits. Apparently my phone isn't built to store every text message I've ever sent or received, every picture I've ever taken, every application I've ever downloaded, every voicemail I've received and pretended like some day I'll get around to listening to, etc. etc. So instead of carefully sifting through to keep what is important or sentimental to me in the last year, I'm just going to delete all of it and start again.

A little extreme? No, no it is not. I can't use the Gmail function on my phone any more because of lack of memory. If my GPS goes next then what's the point of even having a smart phone? I do have a few pictures I want to keep, since I can't Gmail them to myself, I have to throw them up on Facebook save them to my computer, then delete from Facebook.

Ok, back to Self Portraits. Again. For real this time. Here is me with a moustache or mustache (yeah supposedly you can spell it either way, thanks English, or French, or whoever screwed that one up) in support of Movember.

I wasted a solid 3 minutes taking 5-6 pictures of myself with The Pride of Tempe. Yes that's what I decided to name my stache. I mean heaven knows no one can really have pride in the Sun Devils after that loss to Washington State, right?

Anyway, all the pictures turned out terrible, my lack of being both a teenager and a girl did me in, but this duck face one is the best. I am by no means a fan of duck face by the way. I think in this picture it works though, in the ironical "well he's obviously not a teenage girl because he has a mustache, but he's totes doing a duck face, lol" kind of way.

Which brings me back to the whole reason why I updated my blog for the first time in at least 2-3 months. I believe in Men's Health. I also have not kissed a girl the entire time I've been not shaving my upper lip. Granted it's only been 3-4 weeks, so it's not quite like being a missionary all over again, but still not ideal.

Really this isn't about me though. It's about the guys that approach me and congratulate me on The Pride of Tempe and then say something like "Man I would love to do that but my wife/girlfriend/fiance would disown me." What a sad world we live in!

I mean I get it. The male gender generally thinks other males with mustaches are either super bad a** (like Magnum P.I., Clark Gable, or Burt Reynolds) or really funny (like Yosemite Sam, Mario and Luigi, or Hot Rod). Females, on the other hand, are ready to pull out their "r" horns and pepper spray when even they see a man with isolated growth on his upper lip. It's like women with bangs, same concept. They all want to try it, they all think it's "so cute" whenever another women gets them, and some pull it off remarkably well, but others...it's just not a good look for them.

But I'm not here to speak about bangs, or facial hair or what is or isn't trendy. This is about MEN'S HEALTH. Did I withhold my lip loving during breast cancer awareness month? Did I let a pink ribbon prevent me from physical expressions of love and desire? No I did not, I gave out my kisses like candy. (Candy that you only give to one girl for a couple of weeks before you both start doing your own thing without each other, but candy nonetheless) I even wore pink socks to work!!!

This is the plea that I make today. I don't care if I kiss anyone before Thanksgiving (when my upper lip will again become smooth so I can avoid scaring my adorable nieces and nephews who are young and don't see me often enough to recognize me with facial hair). But please please please please please women of the world, do not hold back your men who wish to go forth in the noble cause of Men's Health, if only for the remainder of this the 11th month. In the wise words of Tammy Wynette, "Stand By Your Man."